23 February, 2011

Self-indulgent tripe. Again. Sorry!

BOENBIOABHEW. I don't care about being popular. I honestly don't; I don't mind it, but I wouldn't sacrifice my dignity, life and friends already for it. I'm quite happy being me, but, also being me, I quite liked it when for once I actually did something, acted friendly towards other members of my tutor group that I previously have sparred with, admittedly. My reward was being welcomed into a different friendship group to my normal one, which meant I had made new friends. This is rather a big deal for me, truth be told, and I enjoyed it! I enjoyed getting tagged in photos on Facebook that I would normally have bypassed totally. But then, one of the girls in this group, a newish girl, she's moving schools. Back to her old school, after only half a year at ours...we're all going to miss her, she has been a friendly presence in our tutor group for the past term and a half. So, I was making friends with her and all the others...and then I found out (also on Facebook, hallellujah) that she was inviting everyone in the tutor group plus some others bowling. Tomorrow, actually. Naturally, this didn't include me, which annoyed me; but for her to then LIE about it, claiming that one of our mutal friends had said I was going on holiday so I couldn't make it...the stupid thing is, I actually believed her. Heh! Silly Beth; I questioned Calum (the friend in question) why he'd lied to her. I had told him nothing of the sort; turns out, he told HER nothing of the sort. Right. So, she lied, trying to get one of my friends into trouble with me, for lying, when it was her, lying to save face, just because she didn't want me there. WHAT?! I understand that I'm excessively sarcastic, sometimes minorly cruel and quite cynical...but, we had made friends! There are worse than me in the tutor group...honestly! Maybe I can't see it, because, y'know, I'm me...but surely if I was so awful, I wouldn't have landed such a brilliant boyfriend and some stunning friends? It's not fair; if they find me so utterly unbearable, then why don't they tell me? Be honest, step forward, and speak up. Believe me, it only takes one. I don't know if this way is better, being tricked into thinking I'm liked :L or actually finding out that not that many people really like me very much, at all.

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