I'm rather bored today, so what I did was I went and looked at some of my old Hotmail emails. I meean, OLD old. Really old. Like, two years old. Back with I used to write 'i luv u x x x x' instead of 'I love you :)'. Urgh. My spelling makes me feel ill. Why on earth did I think that it was cool? It's not efficient, it takes longer to process the words you want to say into this rubbishy abbreviated English. RSHEJ6AJW\RJUJ. Gah. It annoys me.
Moving on, though.
I was flicking back through some old emails and I stumbled across a few between me and an old boyfriend. (I say a few, I mean about fifteen thousand). We were talking and talking about everything, and it was around the time when I went to the O2 in London in 2009 (my Year Seven) to perform with about 30 other schools, singing Beatles songs. It was amazing! And as I was reading them, I was transported back to when I was writing them. I remembered every detail of writing each email, sent with a huge smile on my face. At this point, I feel I should tell you that at this point I was going out with a boy whom I'm rather good friends with nowadays...sometimes...and we split up (probably for the better, he's such a cad) after this concert. The day after, in fact.
But the point I'm trying to make is that whilst reading these emails bounced back and forth between the two of us, I could feel how happy I was...it was cringe-worthy, really, I died on the inside when I looked at some of the godawful cheesy stuff I used to say...and feeling how happy I was made it even worse because I knew what was coming.
Have you ever read such a good book that when there's an unexpected bit in it, it makes you jump? Yeah. No sounds, no images, just words. Powerful books...well, it was a bit like that. I didn't jump but when I read the breakup emails I felt shocked. Not sad, because I don't miss him at all, truth be told, he's an idiot :L a lovely idiot, but still an idiot. But I think it's important sometimes, to hold onto the big turning points in your life. That was my first relationship since moving to a completely different school, and it was pretty powerful stuff. I just don't get it really. I don't understand why old events concerning frankly unimportant people should still draw me toward them. It's odd.
But hey, so's life.