14 October, 2012

A lot to explain...

I left Facebook.
I changed.
I grew up.
I got busy. 
I have exams. 
I have retakes. 
I have a million different excuses, none of them feasible.
But please don't lose faith! 
I will return, 
bigger, brighter and bolder than ever. 
Please, just give me twelve hours' solid sleep and I'll be yours once more, Wisdomers. 
I love you.

06 August, 2012


I suppose I AM becoming more mature. Buying things like patchwork doorstops, being scarily possessive about my newly-organised room. Fanatical about finding a job, stopping dying my hair and doing my nails regularly.
I don't even go out much anymore.
That's not exactly through choice though.
Freaking out about uni...
Three years away.
Don't text that much.
Being considered an 'adult' at restaurants.
Thinking about car insurance, petrol etc.
Buying grown-up things.
I change a little bit every year, but I don't actually think I've ever changed this much.
I hope when we go back, my newly-formed persona will concentrate around me like a hard Perspex shield, and I'll be safe.
We shall seeeeeee.
We shall see.

20 July, 2012

A wild Year Review appeared!

What better way to celebrate the end of a long, painful, hilarious year than toasting bitter on a field in the sunset? I can't think of one. It was also an opportunity to assess which of my 'friends' I actually want to acknowledge, and be acknowledged by this summer. So far, the count is about five. That's pitiful. The main reason is, and I hope you guys are reading this, because it's for you! The main reason is because a lot of people have treated me this year in a childish, pointless, mean and bitchy way. And I don't want to be around that for a second longer than I have to, so I do apologise if this comes as a shock to any of you, especially the ones who have taken to RECENTLY ignoring me, now that circumstance is hilarious. I can't imagine why you'd want to talk to me anyway, since I'm so untrustworthy and whatnot. Oh man am I glad to get away. But yeah, breakdown. The good: Parties that I've been invited to this year, entering new relationships, an unexpectedly life-changing ski trip in February, making new friends, starting afresh, surprising myself with a few good GSCE grades, getting better in Art, being crazy-busy in school, dancing, CCF, dyeing the ends of my hair successfully blue, the ongoing search for my sixteenth birthday present (a leather jacket), founding a new school campaign, GRAPHICS, discovering new hobbies, becoming a writer for two websites, my blog overall going from strength to strength, drinking more, finding a new style and WORKING IT! The bad: Ending a long relationship, the subsequent fallout following the ending of said relationship, losing friends, remembering difficult things, my school sadly losing a beautiful girl, being forgotten about, not being well, dyeing the ends of my hair unsuccessfully orange, having to prioritise my activities with my coursework when it got too much, being lonely, getting ill from being stressed, being constantly TIRED, getting one or two hideous grades, an unexpectedly life-changing ski trip in February, making general mistakes, getting awful teachers, dealing with pregnancy scares from 'friends'. The ugly: The way I've been treated by people I thought I loved, washing drink-induced vomit out of a strange girl's hair at a Hallowe'en party, an unexpectedly life-changing ski trip in February, the guilt I felt at not posting regularly for you guys! But basically, I'm going away for the summer, with my Stargirl in one pocket and my hit list in the other. I'll be a different person by September; my room will be organised, my attitude towards education will (hopefully) be different, my hair will be longer and sun-bleached and in hideous condition (the ends) from blue dip-dyeing, and in fantastic condition (the rest of it) from the salt-water, I'll be able to surf better, I'll have reprioritised over the six weeks, and I'll be happier having had a break from everyone I can't stand. Oh, and a comprehensive education in all three Lord Of The Rings films. Feelin' good, amigos. Happy tanning! SUMMER MONTAGE FOR E'RYONE!!!


I came home yesterday to find a rectangular jiffy-bag on the sofa WITH MY NAME ON IT. After this happened, I regained consciousness. So I opened it to find a book with a neon-pink cover on the front, nothing on it except an iridescent silver stick-girl with a scribbly star above. Interest piqued IMMEDIATELY. I turned it over to find a blurb and the usual choice quotes from various big papers. I decided not to read the blurb (LIVING ON ZE EDGE!!!) and just dive straight in, but cracking open the front cover revealed an envelope with my name on it, and opening it produced a stiff white card. Written on the card in the familiar, looping writing of my beloved Auntie was a message to yours truly, explaining the book. It was recommended to me by her best friend, and so she sent it over for me to read. This became fully clear when I read it that evening; Stargirl is a story about a girl who joins a High School in Arizona, and is completely, mercifully, happily different. She plays a ukulele, she sings Happy Birthday to people she doesn't know. She has a pet rat named Cinnamon, and she has an 'enchanted place' in the desert. Unfortunately, the school didn't take to this refreshing burst of originality as well they might have done, and so the story ends with the disappearance of the elusive Stargirl. This ending brought me to tears. The book is relevant to me, because of what's going on at school. I'm not bullied, but I'm being wondrously ignored by people that I started the year with as best friends. And that's because I won't be who they want, I don't want to be someone who fits in to every single group. I do not want to be a person that is so busy pleasing people she doesn't know how to answer the question 'who are you?'. But more on that later. Basically, read this book. If you're different and feeling it, then read it. It will make you smile when she's accepted, and it'll make you fall when they reject her; you will be uplifted and outraged. But it's a good book. Conformity sucks.

16 July, 2012

15. New Artist of the Week: Lisa Hannigan

Every week at TOPICALISE we look at a new artist, you may or may not have heard of the artist, but the article will provide information on the artist as well as songs to check out and where to find out more. This week’s new artist of the week is Lisa Hannigan: Currently, the world of music is saturated with young, hopeful and indeed talented producers, singer-songwriters and the like, all based around a very electronic feel generally speaking. However, one of the reasons why this week's artist was chosen was to give a wider view of the music of today! TOPICALISE, being an up-to-date, fully informative website, aims to provide a well-rounded view of music and talent from all over the world, and what better place to start than Ireland? Dublin-born, 31-year-old Lisa Hannigan is County Meath's shining star; singer-songwriter and keen musician, Lisa was first brought to the forefront of our consciousness in 2002, having met and performed with Damien Rice the year previously in Dublin's Temple Bar. A year later, Lisa featured heavily on his album O, and thus began a 6-year collaboration between the two. Breaking away from the 'Rice Franchise' in early 2007, Hannigan then went on to persue a solo career, releasing her debut album 'Sea Sew' in 2008. As well as this, she supported singer Jason Mraz on his 42-date tour of the US in the same year. Most recently, Lisa's album 'Passengers', was released in October of last year, receiving wide acclaim from The Scotsman, The Irish Times and on 7digital, as well as being given 4/5 by entertainment.ie. Brought to our attention was the catchy, woodsy folk song 'What'll I do', a tuneful, upbeat hit with a video featuring the lovely red-cheeked, fresh-faced Hannigan swaying in time on a fairground ride to her music. The song, featured most recently on TOTP, was also uploaded on to YouTube in February of this year, and has nearly reached 1,000,000 views. Track to check out: What'll I do, and O Sleep featuring Ray LaMontagne Want to find out more about Lisa Hannigan: http://lisahannigan.ie, http://www.youtube.com/user/lisahannigan, http://www.myspace.com/lisahannigan

06 July, 2012

"Blink" and you'll miss it!

Ahhh. Open with a joke, always gets them on your side, Beth. *cringe* hey. Hello the, readers. Well, the three devotees that read this poor thing today. Y'kmow, I think we have established how utterly hopeless I am, and I'm SORRYYYYYYY!!! :( But yep. It was about a month ago now, nearly to the day, that my wonderful brother and father accompanied me to fair London town, to the O2 to go and see one of my very favouritest and bestest bands ever, Blink-182. Ooh, little bit retro. It was an amazing night, and I really shouldn't be attempting to review something that I spent most of the night dancing and crying uncontrollably (as far as both are concerned) at. And anyway, I have photos, a bracelet, a tshirt and a whooooole lot of memories to go with. Another thing about grown-up gigs that turn into concerts is that the support acts are pretty much as good as the headline acts...I mean, sure, there was a band we never heard of called Twin Atlantic who were on first, and yeah, they were a sprightly bunch! Their main support flowed readily from a group of rather inebriated fellows, looking entirely too old to be there actually, steadily swaying from side to side with tears pouring down their ruddy faces and dousing their already fraying polo-shirt collars. Ah well. Live and let live! By stark contrast though, we also had the All American Rejects (apparently flooding me on Twitter, chaps...I mean, the blue tick doesn't lie, does it?!) playing, and the adorable lead singer poured into his skinny jeans writhing on the sweaty stage at various points, and proclaiming in his sleazy Americaaaaaiiiin way that, "Oh, honey...[applying to a near-hysterical audience chick] you're just a baby!! Just a little baby!". Oh man. My kind of gig all over. Unfortunately, I can't say much else, other than to listen to Twin Atlantic, re-visit the AAR and look into purchasing or borrowing indefinitely a copy of 'Neighbourhoods' by my beloved Blink...you won't regret it. I will be posting more soon. I promise. I love you wisdomers. OH MY GOD, NEW NAME FOR MA READERS. COME BACK TO ME, BABIES, I GIVE YOU NICKNAAAAAAAMES! :(

26 May, 2012

None of you sent me Red Cross parcels.

Clearly instead of anything else my aim is now to post MONTHLY. MONTHLY I ASK YOU?! I can't even count that in days!! I have a reason, but not an excuse; exams. In the past week and two days I've had five GCSE exams, y'know, the big, scary ones where you're sat down and you get penalised for turning around? Ohhhh yeahhh. But this really isn't an excuse because, although I have been working really rather hard for my grades, my friend Mawhinney has effortlessly managed to keep his (bigger, more important...) website running Emily, and I haven't done anything No for it onus church a long time...so after I've finished grovelling, I'll be sure to write a new review on. And I found yesterday. Hmmmmmm!!! So, let me break it down for you...last Thursday marked the start of this period of hell, kicking off with RE. As we know, RE is a very black and white subject...to get the grades, just renounce your sins and worship Christ Jesus. So, that was fine. No surprises, vey predictable, everything I'd studied for. What I didn't bank on, however, was my hand inexplicably turning to lead halfway through the exam, until I managed to twitch it back into this world, like Uma Thurman in the first Kill Bill (OOOOHHHH, LITTLE TARANTINO REFERENCE SLIPPED RIGHT IN THERE). Friday was French Oral, in which I forgot how to speak, French or otherwise, but in the end that was fine too. Monday of this week was my second Biology exam, which I had to spend all weekend preparing for, as my far rarely beloved teacher had neglected to mention that he forgot to teach us HALF THE COURSE. Tuesday was English, and again with the lead-handedness, and Thursday was Chemistry! (one word...hrrrngghhh...) And to top it off, I've still got Physics remaining, as well as a week of MOCK EXAMS THAT THE SCHOOL DEIGNED FIT TO WASTE OUR PRECIOUS COURSEWORK TIME WITH, TO 'PREPARE US FOR NEXT YEAR'. I DON'T NEED PREPARATION, YOU SONOFABITCH, I'VE BEEN TO 'NAAM, I'VE SEEN IT AND IT AIN'T PRETTY, SWEETHEART. But anyway, I finally took yesterday off as I've had a bit of a cold all week, that just clung. On. Mercilessly. And that was really nice. I did send out a twitter appeal though, asking for red cross parcels, and this is where my apologies stop, because you cold, soulless people callously ignored me! How very dare you! So, until I can next find the time or the inclination, or a potent combination thereof, I'll leave you with a plea of patience and understanding, as I try and prioritise my world. LLLLLLLLLLOOOOOVEEEEEEE YOOUUUUUUUUU!!!!

07 May, 2012

The ludicrous nature of my GCSE's.

Hey. So, I'm inwardly cringing on my shoddy level of postation (yep, that's what that was just right then), as well as the number of pageviews not having passed much beyond that of about three or four weeks ago. It's just so DIFFICULT sometimes; not that I'm not saying you guys aren't worth it, but I don't understand how I can have so much to do and end up doing nothing important, or of any real value, like my blog. And it's annoying, because I'm constantly scoping out new things to moan about, and then forgetting them! I will admit though, since I got my new phone, my laptop has been slightly superfluous- that's only because going on my laptop --> going on Facebook --> getting annoyed at people's stupidity --> getting no work done, which is why it's been put away. My phone is easier to disregard. But anyway, bear with me as my next onslaught of anger comes hurtling down the cyberspace to greet you guys, facially.

Last Tuesday, I had my parent's evening at school, which is essentially where my parents get press-ganged into spending ludicrous amounts of time amongst people we all secretly hate, and teachers that drive us insane. It's all eventually for the greater good- my progress, my mental stability etc. etc. so it's not all bad, but the time we have to spend there is still a massive downer on the REST OF OUR LIVES.
But anyway. All of my classmates consistantly joke that in certain lessons (English, Art and R.E in particular), I have a penchant for ''arguing my way out of a GCSE''. What they mean by this is my mawkish ability to question the assigned task thrown at us carelessly, to adress such burning issues as, ''Why are we being graded on interpretation/our own opinion/our personal responses? Surely that's a deathtrap, ending in either reaping full marks for having the ''right'' opinion (in this case, a fantastically whimsical ideal, sociality p.o.v), or getting downgraded for thinking the wrong thing faster than you can say ''I heart capitalism''. I mean, I just don't understand how seeing it from the commoner's side of the story is going to help me in later life'', or words roughly to that effect. See, I love politics. I love arguing with everyone and anyone stupid enough to question my responsibilites, my intentions and my personal preferences in the face of Science and Religion. And I've always, always, always said, time and time again, that I will willingly accept anyone who can fully demonstrate to me their intentions; for example, I'd readily take a member of the KKK out for a slap-up meal if we were going to discuss policies, and his own personal motivation for the cause. Or, okay, another example- racist white pressure groups not being the best demonstrative example, as I am a little white girl. How about meeting Ed Milliband, or even ole' Gordon or Tony if I wanted a giggle. I'd happily sit through their excrutiating excuses and 'reasons' if it meant they were explaining fully to me why they did, thought, said what they did, thought, said.

The convoluted point of all this is that I love everything to do with politics- I may seem very close-minded on teh interwebz, but I'm in fact the polar opposite. I take a great interest in the world around me, and find nothing more compelling than seeing a public arguement between two oppositions.
However, something I don't agree with is the sneaky intergration of politics into my education. MY EDUCATION. Forgive me when I say that I take strongly against being taught off the bat that WMD and abortions are WRONG, you're a SAINT if you follow the Green Peace movement, and this ridicuous notion of red-collar learning. Yep, that's right, I even detest being taught to become a doctor or a lawyer straight on my very first day. When I grow up, and have children, I will give them my opinions, I will tell them why I think and do what I think and do, but I will always give them the whole story, like my parents did to me, and like their parents did to them. And do you know why?

Because if I didn't do that, I would be just the same as every other filthy, thieving, low-down hypocrite walking this sweet Earth, and telling us, the next generation, lies about how the world is.
I just thank God I realised it, and can now sleep through this poisionous whimsy in class.

26 April, 2012

Get your social networking right, morons!

Hello!! This is just a verrrry quick post to let off a bit of steam, and it's being done from my phone so I do apologise for any preposterous spelling atrocities, courtesy of my lovely AutoCorrect-type-thingy. Why not disable it, I hear you cry?! Millions cried out...sorry, what? Ya whatwhat? Well, the answer unfortunately is once again my laziness. Yes, folks, and don't claim to be surprised. You know how lazy I am, and you don't even know me! And the reason I don't disable autocorrect is because I like the fact that it periodically changes my incorrect lower case musings, and I don't think I could be as fantastically eloquent as I am without it. No, that's a lie becausex as I'm sure you've gathered by now, I don't spell check this old thing, and all my posts until now have been done on a computer somehow, somewhere. Times a-changin'! But yes, the reason you're all gathered here, at your collective computers about the world, most probably, as I AM now famous. (yes, I fully consider 7,000 page views to constitute as Internet blogger fame. THANK YOUUUUUU!!!) the reason I've requested my extended worldly family's presence is simply because I want to moan about facebook and twitter. I've been on twitter for little under two years now, and I got it BEFORE Facebook, and primarily for my blog promotion as well. Now? Everyone I know has twitter because they can! They clearl misunderstand, unlike the other however many billion (probably...) users, and have mistaken twitter for another version d Facebook. I'm fyig to shout toast of these people that the reason they have soapy follower is because they're socially popular, at school. It' the rough equivalent to having 1,000 friend on Facebook. But I'd much rather have 1,000 twitter followers, because unknown that's only for my blog, not for my FACE or my bitchy tweets. I caught someon on there saying, "tweet me a number and I'll write something!". Well, no. That's for facebook, you douche. You complete moron, how dare you sully MY twitter, MY world, with your stupid social climbing desperation?! Don't you dare get Twitter just becaus you're ores of Facebook, like my entire school did, any of you. Or you'll be banned from me and my wisdom forthwith. EEEEEEEJITS!!!

16 April, 2012

Just gigging along...

In my lifetime, I've been to six gigs, which is pretty pathetic.
They are as follows;
2008- Foo Fighters, Led Zeppelin, Queens Of The Stone Age, Them Crooked Vultures.
2010- Eliza Doolittle, Paloma Faith.
2011- Mayday Parade, Blitz Kids, A Rocket To The Moon, We Are The In Crowd/Blessing To A Burden/2x independant gigs.
This year, I've made plans to go to at least two more gigs, Friends with the magical Mawhinney in Birmingham next month, and Blink-182, Four Year Strong and You Me @ Six in June with a friend. These are really pulling me through at the moment, there's nothing quite like the feverish excitement of gigging.
For example, I'm hoping most of you know by now that at least a quarter of the excitement of a night out, be it a party, a club or a gig, is getting ready. This applies to boys as well as girls, it's not just chicks that shower and do their hair before making a public appearence. But you know how it is; you spend a couple of hours showering, doing hair and make-up, getting clothes, probably doing all this with a friend. And as you go, you're listening to music, most likely some sort of 'dance mix', or maybe an artists' playlist if you're going to see them live. And you're dancing, singing, getting excited. IT'S AWESOME.
There's the social aspect; having a mini-party as you get ready with friends, the weeks leading up to the event when you're getting organised and, certainly in my case, it's all you can talk about.
And then there's the actual experience. Of getting into the gig, of seeing all these people jumping as one, and shouting at each-other to be heard, or the palpable excitement of the crowd when the house lights go down once more...the way you all cheer and dance and jump together, everyone looking beautiful and feverish and excited by the music. There's such an amazing feeling of total unity when you're jumping and waving, and I hate to say it, but it's love. There's so much love there, because it's hard to hate people when you're so close to them your sweat's getting mixed up. Yeah, it's gross, but it's bonding!

My advice is, go to as maaaaaaaaaany gigs as you possibly can. Honestly, just grab a ticket off the internet, or off a friend if you can blag one. If it's someone you've never heard of (which is often better, because you don't know what to expect, and if it's an Unknown, the tickets are quite a bit cheaper than the big guys) then strive to get there. Work up your own delirium, it's so worth it to get there and see everyone go crazy.
Do it! My aim is to go to 100+ gigs in my lifetime, and I will achieve it. I promise.

I'm obviously not ''fashionabible''...

Yes, again as with regards to the title, I KNOW I've included extra letters, but it makes the word so much more fun to say. Same goes to responsibible, sensibible, terribible and the rest. It's fantastic; just one of those little things you can slip into a conversation, that make people stop and go, ''Wait- what??'' about five minutes later. Something small to bring a smile to my face, you know how it is.
That brings me on to an anecdote, before the actual point of this post (my, my, Beth, aren't we excelling today...), that was recently rehashed over a bottle of gin amongst my parents, their friends and me. It sounds so boring, but it's actually times like this when I love being me, and living my life. It's fantastic.
But anyway! The anecdote, dear hearts!
My Dad's friend was job-hunting a while back, and typing up his CV (incedentally, just written my very own and first CV for a job of a shop assistant! Wish me luck!) he distributed it etc. etc. as you do. It was only when he re-read it that he discovered under his profile, the word 'determinated'. Now, being as I am, grammatically-inclined, should I say, I noticed the apparent hilarity of this straight away, and proceded to laugh, muchly. And the next thing he said (in real-life, over the gin bottle, not in his CV) was that, looking us dead in the eye, it was 'perfectly cromulent' to use that word. Cromulent isn't a word either, but how many of you actually knew that before I told you? How fantastic is that?! It's brilliant. Just a silly little manipulation of the English language, or a glorious invention slipped subtly into a conversation...gah! It's just fantastic.

Now, moving on to the title-point (I should really patent that, it's a very good phrase. Yet more word-manipulation!). I suppose we've all noticed the Kony2012 campaign spreading rapidly over Twitter, Facebook and even the news to an extent (how sad is it that I'm surprised a piece of news is actually on the news, and yet perfectly accepting of it on social networks?), and probably the way it's been affecting people around us. I certainly do; a lot of people I know are partaking (allegedly...) in 'Cover The Night' projects next Friday, of literally skipping through Newbury town and papering it between the hours of 6:30pm and 6:30am with posters, leaflets and banners. I've been invited to several such events, and haven't responded, purely to gain this information and thus the level of stupidity rising. It's dangerous, you see...you can actually 'catch' stupid. But anyway. I'm not going to divulge to those of you who are unaware of this campaign, but what I will give you is a massive cookie for not actually caring enough to see anything about it, or just by sheer coincedence avoiding everything to do with our old pal Kony.
You see, I disagree. This is the point where everyone gets up in arms, 'How can you not care about the sake of 10,000 Ugandan children?!', 'It'd be different if it was you being kidnapped' etc. etc. And, here's the thing; I tend to get severely UNresponsive when people jump down my throats, so, sit down and let me explain. The thing is, Kony's actions have been happening for 20+ years now, and the reason it's only just hit the news over here, and thus everyone's consciences, is because a (very corrupt) charity called Invisible Children made a 30-minute long video which, for some reason went very viral (can I say that? It's cromulent...) very quickly. And thus everyone on Facebook is now filled with self-righteous indignation of the, 'He's so mean', 'I can't believe he's been allowed to get away with this' and 'Think of the children' variety...this is manifested in statuses, mostly.
Now, as I'm on the side of the opposition, the side that believes that, actually, a status or two isn't going to put a stop to 20 years' worth of terror, and that the people in POWER are actually dealing with it, and given their positions, salaries and reputations, probably know what they're talking about...you never know, the higher authority might just have a couple of ideas up their political wizard sleeves.
Unfortunately, for me and several others, our continued resistance (read 'pig-headedness') to the righteous causes of awesome has rendered us the target of many a campaign, many a Facebook slating. And so, I'm just wondering, when did an opinion become fashionable? When did it become 'cool' to agree with everyone, and to join them in their own personal stands? This isn't right; it should be 'cool' to be able to back up your argument, which is excactly what my friends and I were NOT allowed to do. So, we sat back and we proceeded to make jokes about the situation instead. If people weren't going to listen to us, we weren't going to humour them by taking their ridiculous sanctimony seriously.

That was a good few weeks back, and with the Cover The Night date fast approaching (20th-21st April- next Friday and Saturday for those of you chillin' in the GMT with my good self), I'm just wondering now what's going to happen; see, all the people that were motivated by their right-on indignity haven't spoken, nay, whispered, of Kony for weeks now. It was literally one night, during which Facebook blazed with awesome. So, when they all suddenly jump up again, in all their glory, I will have no choice but to laugh, and laugh, and laugh. It's all you can do, when everyone around you refuses to listen to logic.

14 April, 2012

A spider just jumped out of my bin.

Some days I am floored by the monotony of my life. Get up, get dressed, do face, go to school, go home...
Sometimes there's really not that much to look forward to. But then again...sometimes, something really stupid happens, probably not for any kind of reason other than to further perplex you. Or maybe it's to scare you back into normality. Sometimes, I'll wake up and my routine will be disturbed by a not-altogether pleasant surprise. And it's then that I'll pine fruitlessly for everything to return to normal.
And even though I hate normal,
I'd take that over a spider jumping out of my bin anyday.

09 April, 2012


I fail to see how it could have escaped your notice, regulars, but I'm now a member of a team! A WRITING TEAM. On an actual, actual real website ting. It's aaaaaawesome. Here's the link;
And again;
So, go and visit it. It's a fantastic site, put together by the magical Mawhinney and the delightful...dapper (?) James Dowen! The talent by these boys, as well as the fourth writer, Jamie ''Jams'', is astounding, and not to big myself up or nothing (hehehe) but I think that the four of us certainly have the type of dedication to really get this website off the ground; the addition of more writers can only be a good thing!
Please, please, please visit the site; it's fantastically put together, there's already so much content on it, and something for literally everyone. And we're looking for more writers, so if you fancy it, apply! It will be amaaaaaaazing!!!
If you have any questions, you can always Tweet any one of us, including the administrator(s) of the actual site, or of course, email the Topicalise address, or just stick a comment down below.
Our twitter addresses are as follows;
The magical Mawhinney- @Olly_96
The dapper Dowen- @J_Dowen
The 'j'enius James- @jams1999
*NB: sorry for the poor alliteration of the last address; will think of a better one in due course!*
Or, of course, me!
The brilliant Beth- @WisdomOfBeth
AND, last but not least,
The 'totally magical/dapper/'j'enius/brilliant' Topicalise- @TOPICALISE

I think I can speak for all of us when I say we'd love to hear from you!
G'night, regleeeeurs.

Eyes backwards.

For my 14th birthday, I went with my Mum and her friend to the Hammersmith Apollo in Laaarnndarn, on Monday the 8th November to go and see Eliza Doolittle and Paloma Faith in concert. Apoplectic with excitement, as it was only my second gig and Paloma Faith was MYFAVOURITEARTISTINTHEWORLDEVEROK?!, I couldn't stop bouncing, and took the three hours' standing as NOTHING in my stride. And rightly, as it was an amazing gig, and I had such a fantastic time WITH MY MUM!! Eliza was fantastic, and made us all laugh; she was only sixteen at the time, and I remember being so amazed that such a huge voice could come from such a young girl! But she was amazing, and had us all enraptured for a good half hour at least.

Then there was the half hour wait, during which time all the house lights kept going down, as did the hum from the audience, and thenc oming back on again, to get us all geared up for the performance. And it. Was. Amazing.

Paloma Faith sings with such passion and honesty that it's hard to tear your eyes away for even a second. She played all my favourites, including a fantastic, uproarious cover version of 'F*** You' by Cee-Lo Green, which was done brilliantly.

But that's not the purpose of this post. The purpose of this post is not to write a review of a gig that happened a year and a half ago. This is a testimony to Paloma Faith's ex-bassist-turned-performer, Seye Adelekan!

Seye (Eyes spelt backwards) is twenty years old, and has already been the guitarist for Paloma, as well as the band The Noisettes, and Ellie Goulding. His brother is Bgnega, from the band Metronomy, and his new music has already been played by Rob Da Bank and Huw Stephens. A link for his track 'Mexicana Bounce' is included below;
and had me singing along literally within one replay of the song. He's also recently released 'White Noise', which has had an average rating of 9 from NME; this is truly well-deserved though, because Seye is just the kind of artist you can see yourself playing over and over, and not getting tired. I think the main thing that makes him so, well...listenable, is the amount of layering that goes in to his music. For example, you have the easy lyrics, catchy words that have you repeating him effortlessly by the second or third play. It's the perfect blend of tried-and-tested song structure, mixed with the irresistable, bubbly feel of a place different to where you are. Mexicana Bounce is my new favourite thing, because the video is so HAPPY, and matches the song, and what I hope to be Seye's personality so, so well.

To conclude, listen to him. He's fantastic, and has accomplished so much in the last couple of years. MARK MY WORDS; Seye Adelekan will be H-YOW-GE. And remember, you heard it here first ;D

Mawhinney's magic!

Hey guys, bored of me yet? Haha, I can't tell you how strange it is to be typing on a normal keyboard again, I've pretty much been living from my phone for the past three days or so, I'm in love!! I don't know about you horrible lot, but I've had a brilliant weekend; nothing better than spending Easter amongst family and friends, with lots of chocolate, amazing food and just a smidgeon of the ole' alcoholic beverages...FANTASTIC!

The main reason for writing (because yes, I do have a point to this...) is to let you guys know abut a friend of mine. Well, I hope I can call him a friend...but anyway. So, my fantastic friend Mr. Mawhinney is a fellow blogger of mine (find him at http://oliver-mawhinney.blogspot.com, but not for much longer!!) is breaking away from Blogspot, believe it or not! We first 'met' over Twitter, bonded by our mutual love for Seye Adelekan (@SeyeMusic on Twitter) (look out for a post about him soon!), and from there, it just grew! We followed each-other, read and liked each-other's blogs etc. etc. and here we are! Then on Friday night, I was presented with a 'blogging opportunity' by none other than Mr. Mawhinney, who's starting up his very own website! I was asked, amongst others, to be a writer on said website, in return for links to this old thing, and hopefully increased pageviews and recognition.

The site launches at 8:30pm tonight, and no doubt I'll be plastering the link over here, Twitter and Facebook, so keep an eye out! Please do visit it, as knowing Mawhinney as I do (albeit in a cyber fashion, but nonetheless!) it'll be a fantastic website!

That's not to say this lovely thing will be being neglected, as I don't think anthing could encourage me to write, more than being touted as a 'writer' for a big website, and being given my own writer's profile! :O

I am speechless with excitement.

05 April, 2012

Slightly confused, if I'm honest...

How many of you, my lovely readers, my awesome bloggettes, actually know me? Do any of you have any idea as to the girl behind the words, the one who writes all of this anger and comedy? This blog, truth be told, is usually a parody of my life, the kind of thing that takes away any seriousness about something really bothering me. And, thus far, everyone who follows me on Twitter, who likes my page on Facebook, who leaves comments, largely don't know me. None of you do. If you passed me on the street, you wouldn't recognise me. To hear me speak, you probably wouldn't guess who I am. Even if you were doing some kind of voyeur-istic, creepy look-in on my life, you'd have no clue whatsoever that I was me. Until you saw me open my laptop, pull out my chair, curl up and start my trusty old keyboard-pounding. And you know something, dudes? I really love that. You don't actually care what I've done, what I've been through, or what I want to do with my LIFE (incidentally, another post coming up, maybe? Watch this space >.<), and I think that's why I feel closer to 6,000 strangers than to the people I see every day at school. But the thing is, the confusing thing...they don't show me the love that you guys do! I'm not saying it's a god-given right...anyone who's loved should be grateful for that, because it's a really precious thing...but these strangers at school still hate me? They probably know more about me than you do, readers. But, they don't like me? And that's probably wherein the issue lies; they know about me. But, I hasten to add, what they've heard is different to what they actually know, and that's the main issue; nowadays that line is being repeatedly blurred, so much so that I'm scarcely given a chance to forge new friendships. And most of the time, I don't care. I really, really don't.

Too long, some might say...

Most of you won't get the title (who even does?) but it's a link from my old friend's most recent post-title, to this one. And this friend and I fell apart, regrettably. A lot. We argued more than anyone I've ever known, and even when we weren't together, we still argued. Fire with fire? More like fire with petrol. It was fun at first but then it got too painful, and we both kept getting down because of it. So in the end we called it quits, but of course that didn't work...I mean, you can't walk away from petrol can you? The moment before the explosion, when everything gets static, before the ultimate WOOOOOOSH, taking away everything and cleaning it. Or burning it. Or both.
So we carried on. Until I got too down, and he got too angry, and we just stopped. We threw water over the relationship and walked away from the embers, because really? What else are you supposed to do with these two things that keep exploding in beautiful, dangerous, harmful ways? Drown it. Fight it with something that makes it stop working, aka water. And the water was the other dude, but he didn't know it yet. And it'll be cool when I stop regretting all the stupid stuff I've done to get to this point, but not yet. Nooooot just yet...

04 April, 2012


Happily, being the proud owner of Twitter and Facebook pages for my blog, both with comfortable ratings of more than 3 people in terms of popularity, I can look at branching out, or to paraphrase my last post, adding another jewel in my empire of Beth-ness, or some such whimsy. SO, as also mentioned in the previous post (why are you even reading this one? Clearly the last post has all the information you need to know...), I was looking into the idea of vlogging.

Vlogging is a portmanteau (French for, 'word child') of the words 'video' and 'blogging'; essentially, a blog, therefore a further extension of WR, but in video format. This means that I'd still be blogging on this ole' thing *pats affectionately*, but I'd also be adding vlog posts to a YouTube channel.

I think it'd definitely be something to consider, because then you lovely readers could leave me video responses and you know how this chica right here is all up in the grill of Communication...I think that starting a channel on YouTube could really be beneficial. A couple of my friends from school are on Twitter, with over 500 followers, purely because they post videos on their channels, so the viewers get to see the real person.

It also means you can see how fantastically funny I am, finally put a name and a voice to all my inane ramblings, and probably laugh at all my bloopers. I shall make bloopers.

Also, as another idea for a fresh take on TWOB's EMPIREEEEEEE (fantastic. Do I get minions with that?), please feel free to ask me some questions!! Facebook (The Wisdom Of Beth 'fictional character), Twitter (@WisdomOfBeth 'Beth Parker- be interesting and be interested') and, of course, here, are all available, so leave some queries in the comment box down yonder, and I'll hopefully be able to add an FAQ PAGE SOON!! Gah, I've ALWAYS wanted one of those. It's like I'm interesting enough for someone to enquire, or some such.

31 March, 2012

''Bite me, kiss this''

Nostalgia makes me ache for a time when everything was a lot easier. A time before Tumblr, before Dubstep...before Twitter, before Bangarang. And the only thing that makes me happy is knowing that I don't have to go through all this rubbish again. But, I'd take it all again if things could go back to the way they were, before the times I wake up sweating in the middle of the night with my stomach churning and my breath cut off. Before I avoided Facebook for five days, because I was too scared of what I was going to find on there. Before I felt the need to spend every lunchtime in the Graphics room. Before I felt sick whenever I got a text. It's not like I'm bullied, hounded at every corner. It's not like I fear for my life. Hell, I've already undergone social death. No, it's more like...I miss being able to look my best friend in the eye, I miss being able to do what I want, and screw the consequences. I miss being so happy my feet don't touch the ground.

But hey, bitches. Guess nostalgia makes me repetative too, huh?


I'm fully aware of the way I just spelt 'holiday'. No comments, please.
IYAAAA GUYSSSSSS!!! I'm officially off now, no more school for the next eighteen days! And I'm really looking forward to the break. I mean sure, I'll have to fill it with some amount of revision for my six (SIX?! I CAN'T EVEN COUNT THAT HIGH) upcoming exams, in the summer. But I'm looking forward to it, not least because for the next nearly-three weeks, I can eschew with a firm hand anyone who's been making me miserable for the last month or so. Consider yourself eschewed, guys. Hahahahaha. Who's laughing now?! But, I digress (Easter digression? Do I win an easter egg?!), with the fact that I've already written a post about the haters (thank you for all the love on that!) and I don't care anymore! I thought I'd better write a brief (hahahaha brief) update to balance out all the nonsensical tweets I've been...well, er, Tweeting...in the past week or so. And that's because I've re-discovered Twitter!! Ah, sure, I post my blog posts on there, but I'll let you into a secret my friends, my dear ovely friend-folk...I cheat! I've cleverly linked my Facebook blog page (The Wisdom Of Beth...LIKE IT!!!) to my Twitter account (@WisdomOfBeth...recurring theme here?!) which I've also linked to my Facebook profile. This means that within literally about a second, I can post a link to my most recent update on here (this lovely, doolally thing), which gets transferred to Twitter, which gets transferred to my actual Facebook profile! Magic! This also means that none of my regulars have an excuse for not liking my page, or keeping up-to-date with my blog, because I span all three now. All the time. So ha.

Firstly, I was thinking vaguely about shutting down my social Facebook account, and just moving on to Twitter. The merits to this action, would be in paticular that I could cut down on the number of arguements I was having per day (about 2.4...the average number of children), as well as avoiding the things I don't want to see when I go on Facebook! Twitter's also much more grown-up (or should I say mature...), and everyone on there just seems less...petty. So, we'll see.
However, the downfall to my awesome plan of awesome, is that I would be seriously out of the loop. I would have to INTERACT with people at SCHOOL, FACE-TO-FACE, to find out the menial comings-and-goings of their lives. Also, I couldn't chat to a lot of people, as if I wanted to do that on Twitter, I'd have to find all my Facebook friends and follow them, or persuade them to get Twitter THEN follow them, if I wanted to chat. Which, of course, is what Facebook's for, not Twitter. But I'm switching networks soon, so maybe I'll just find a way round it. Gah, who knows!

Secondly, and this is something I want feeeeeeedback on please! A lot of my friends have YouTube channels, some of which are for showcasing talents (singing, movie-making, dancing), a couple of which are just so that they can get subscribers and subscribe to EVERYONE, and a few treat them as vlogs. Now vlogs, my lovely blogettes, are excactly like what I'm doing, here, right now. Blogging. But, in video-form. Bear with me...but, I think it could really take off. I could do a post on here, then record myself reading it, stick that on YouTube, and have ANOTHER jewel to add to my cyber-empire of Bethness. Give me feedback, because I think it'd be awesome to interact with you guys. HEY, I COULD EVEN DO A Q & A SESSION!! :O

Gah, the ideas.
Right, now I'm going to down approx. a metric ton of coffee, head to work and revise under the counter. S'laters, lovelies!

21 March, 2012

Jus' keyboard-poundin'

Alright guys, so hi. In many ways, this post is a massive thank you. Not only to my friends and family, for enduring me day after day, for giving me lovely stuff and making me cry with laughter, for making me the luckiest girl in the world, for deigning to reside in my overwhelming presence. Nope, this is a massive, HUGE thank you to all the bitches. All the 'haters'. Everyone who shouts at me on the bus, everyone who writes statuses about me, who publicly embarasses me, who, at one point, made me too scared to venture on to Facebook. And what I'm saying guys, is thank you so much, for making dread sink to the bottom of my stomach with a nauseating familiarity, every time my inbox proclaims (1). Thank you totally for making me walk into my Geography class half an hour late, to be faced with nameless laughing and made-up stories. Thank you massively, to everyone who shouts over me, and regard logic as a foreign being. Thank you entirely for making me distrust everyone, making me feel alone, and making me treat my school work as escapism. Thank you, because I know that now, if I can get through all the endless jibes, the name-calling, the refusal to see logic or my side of the story, the wasted lunchtimes, then I can survive ANYTHING IN MY LIFE. And you want to know why I'm writing a blog post about it? Well for one thing, my blog is the one place I can say what I really think, truly feel, without you idiots shouting me down. I can say whatever I like, and I can explain my side of the story should I choose to. THAT'S why I'm a ''keyboard-warrior''. Because I cannot be heard any other way. The second reason is because the six thousand+ pageviews, plus comments, emails, messages, Facebook Likes etc. let me know that the real loves of my life, the real reason I write this blog, I go to school, I stay being me, are on the other side of my monitor.
So a huge, great big effing THANK YOU, once again, to everyone who's boosting my Graphics grade no end, considering the fact that I've spent every single lunchtime in there for a week now.

Love you long time.

18 March, 2012

Quand je suis allé à Bayonne!

Dans mes vacances, je suis allé à Bayonne, en France! C'était de belles vacances, et nous (moi et ma famille) reviendrons, et bientôt! Bayonne est un ville dans le sud-ouest de la France, et quand je suis allé, il y avait quelque chose pour toute la famille. Par example, les sites d'intérêt inclus la Cathédrale Sainte-Marie, le Musée Bonnat (qui est la galerie meilleure dans le sud-ouest de la France...je pense que cette est vrai!), et le Gare de Bayonne. Quand je suis allé, nous avons découvert quelle le ville est célèbre pour sa cuisine...Bayonne a le jambon meilleur dans la monde! Nous sommes allés au Cafe Moka, quie est près de le Chateau Neuf. C'était un cafe petit, où la cuisine est moins chére que d'autres. Par example, pour le déjeuner j'ai eu un sandwich jambon, avec un petit bouteille de coca, qui était €4.50! Aussie en Bayonne, le ville est très joli, donc moi et ma famille est allé faire du promenade. Nous avons vu beaucoup des bars, des magasins (des magasins du vêtements, des supermarchés...), et deux bibliothéques. Il y avait aussi deux autre hôtels, à proximité de notre hôtel...mais, notre hôtel était le meilleure! Et finallement, pour moi le clou était le nuit finale...je suis allé à Le Club Six Quatre avec mes parents...mais, pas longtemps, car c'était un bar pour les adults!
Vous devez visiter Bayonne!!

1) Le prémier image...Le Club Six Quatre!

2) La deuxième image...la belle Cathédrale Sainte-Marie!

3) Et le troisième, la restaurant fantastique, le Cafe Moka!

07 March, 2012

Why do war?

Recently, there's been a lot of anti-war stories, in the good ole, trusty, reliable media. Also, being taught to us in school, there's the general consensus that war is bad; war is very bad, and if you support, or partake, or don't share the general view of, you are barbaric, uneducated etc. etc.
Now, I don't suppose there's any way to put war in a good light. Not, for that matter, would I ever want to; I think that most wars have a devastating effect on the country and people, not to mention the enormous impact it has on social, economic and environmental factors. However, I would love people to have a little bit more faith in the leaders of our world than demanding a war because it's fun. Bloodshed, explosions and national or international wreckage are good fun to watch? I don't think so. I hate to shock everyone, but WAKE UP. War is a necessary evil. It may not be pretty, or moral, or halfway decent to entertain thoughts about...but, it's there. It's around. IT HAPPENS. And I hate all these sanctimonious people who think parading around at national events with stupid signs, or posting statuses about things that are occuring, think that it's going to change everything. An occurance, whilst not altogether natural but certainly familiar, is hundreds of years old! I watched a YouTube video earlier (at least, I did until I heard this next phrase), where a man was holding some kind of ridiculous seminar. From his lips, the phrase, ''Who AREN'T you to stop war?'' was uttered, to scores of cheers and much celebration. If I were there, I would've punched him. Who aren't we to stop wars? So, what does that imply, that if we were a little bit more proactive, then these wars, conflict that has cost millions upon millions of pounds, dollars, euros, yen, whatever you want to use...this idiotic, dillusioned man is proclaiming that if we spoke to each-other and adressed the topic of war, and if we posted a couple of statuses with links to sites about stopping fighting, then it would just magically go away? To that, I simply say, grow up.

03 March, 2012

The musical stylings of White House!

Hello, ladies and gentlemen! So, upon browsing Facebook this evening, I came across a video. Basically, a hastily recording of my friend's band, doing a cover version of 'I Bet You Look Good On The Dancefloor' by Arctic Monkeys. Even though I don't like the original, this is one of a few covers that I'd actually say beat the original, by far. The bandmates are all pretty cool, and they don't take themselves too seriously, which is a huge thumbs-up. All of them are funny, and really talented; if they stick with this, I think they might just go pretty far. Below is a link to the video on Facebook, although I'm not sure if you'll be able to access it.

And for the record,
Alex- Bassist,
George- Drums and
David- Guitar and Vocals.

Really nice guys, all of them. Watch, rate, vote, contact, whatever. Just share the love!

27 February, 2012

Mulbach, Mulbach, Mulbach 2012!

Hello, Guten Tag, Hallo, Bienvenue, Bonjour, Salut, Bon soir!
Sorry, just testing out the languages of ALL THE COUNTRIES I PASSED THROUGH ON THE WAY TO AUSTRIA.
It was amazing. And when I say amazing, I mean genuinely amazing. I really want to do it again, especially as the last two days weren't scary at all! It was such an awesome experience, to make new friends and reconnect with old ones...to have a laugh and share memories...to feel like one big, massive, happy family by the end of it.
I won't lie, there were a lot of lows before the highs; but they were just as memorable and...character-building. Let's see...
The first skiing day, I got sat on.
I very nearly got into a lot of trouble for losing ski equipment.
I got rejected, and had to ski the next day when I hated it.
I punched a boy in the face, made him bleed (in a public restaurant) and nearly got myself packed off home.
And, some other general stuff too. But, on the whole, I'd do it all again, just for the highs...
Skiing down my first slope; so pathetic it was nearly horizontal, but I was over the moon for it!
Taking on about five different blue slopes straight away, and one and a half reds.
Not being freaked by the ski lift.
Having so many laughs it was unbelieveable.
Forming new friendships.
Patching up a lot of stuff on the coach journey home :)
The massive snowball fight on the last day that had everyone feeling like a big ole' family.
The lovely, lovely hotel owner Maria, and her patience with us, plus her amazing cooking!

It was singularly, one of the best holidays I've ever had. Everyone I went there with has now been changed in my eyes...some for the worse, but most for the better! I wouldn't trade those experiences felt for anything; I would never do it over, even if I was magically endowed with the most amazing, prolific skiing powers! My skiing group (Millie, Ellie, Ed, Tom, Ethan, Dom, Charles, Alex, Henry and Brandon) and my roomies (Millie and Ellie), as well as almost all the girls on our floor, most of the boys on the floor above us, and a few of the teachers, helped to make this holiday emotional, dramatic, troublesome, scary, mental, hilarious, extreme and absolutely unforgettable. Mulbach, I'll never, ever forget you!

06 February, 2012

But first...much excitement abounds!!

I'm leaving on Friday!!
Not for EVER. Just, like, half an hour.
Lol, jokes. A week.
Just, a week.
A holiday over half term.
That's it.
Seven days.
Well, eight; including travelling.
So yeah,
That's it.
A casual holiday.
Without my family.
Just me.
And some friends.
And some other douchebags I don't really like.
Going to Austria for a week.
I can't ski.
I'm taking my teddy.

To blog, or not to blog?

Recently, there's been a lot of stuff going on, so I haven't really had too much time to plan out posts. Yeah, that may surprise you, that I actually THINK these things through occasionally :L but, yes, I do. And alas, that planning time has evaded me thus far. So, I'm going to make a list of things I want to write about, and share with all of you; it's so that I can look back at them in the fuure when I have some more time, and set about building up some words to acompany them. So, here we are!
Religion v. Science.
The Education System.
The Media.
Bleeding-Hear Liberalism.
Politics in general.
Playground politics.


01 February, 2012

Back on track (and ANECDOTES!)

First of all, readers, I must hasten to as for your forgiveness. My cumulative post total so far this year has been shockingly bad, and I really should apologise; what little posts I have deigned to write have mostly been self-indulgent crap, basically. Sorry to anyone offended.
But this all serves to remind me that really, I have an awful lot to be happy for, and I am pretty happy at the moment so. I'm not going to waste any more time, or any more of YOUR time, readers; because I know time is precious, and if you choose to spend yours reading my brain-words, then I could at least have the decency to make it worthwhile.
However; allow me just one last, self-indulgent, emotionally-charged drama...
You're hurting? Good.

That's better! Now, where were we? Ah, yes, next on the agenda (that reminds me, I really should get my school council badge at some point...thaaaaaanks, blog *cheesy grin* *thumbs up*), anecdotes.
I know you probably find this hard to believe dear readers, but at least once every day a moment of upmost comedy occurs, and makes me inexplicably happy for the rest of the day. Two such incidents, I would now like to recall with you. *This would work so much better with a glass of wine, a roaring fire and a cosy armchair*. So, the first. Well, on Monday night, I was knelt adoringly at my parent's feet as they sat on the sofa and exchanged various witticisms regarding their days, and I chupped in with one of mine; it went, that I was sat in french that morning when a random thought occured. Our tumble dryer, I should explain, is housed in the shed in the garden. Until recently (i.e French on Monday), I hadn't really given much thought as to how it was powered. It was only when I was making my lunch that morning that I noticed an errant plug trailing against the wall, up the side of the window, outside, and round the corner of the house. In French, I realised that it was the power lead for the tumble dryer to tumble!!! Until then? I had assumed, naturally, that it was battery-powered...AA's, that is, not even 9V's...oh, the absolute shame of it.
My second anecdote? Possibly less humourous...or more so, it depends if you thrive on human misery. If so (you're like me), congratulations! You are entirely NORMAL. Well done. What do you want, a medal? No? A cake? No. I haven't got time. No, seriously. Honestly, just, just go away. Seriously. Go. Now.

Yes, so, the second story. Recently, I did an English exam, of the speaking variety. Now, as I'm sure many of you will empathise with, public speaking curdles the very liquid in my stomach-bag. However, getting that A* is even more important to me than holding on to my breakfast juice (and seriously guys, if you've never had orange and mango juice, get some. Like, right now. Oh my sweet Christ :3), so I gave it a shot. I won't go into the intricacies, but what I will say is that I came back down, and I really felt like I'd properly messed. It. Up. However, I pushed forward...it was fine, I was okay. And I got my results back yesterday, 14/15 which was very, very roughly equivalent to an A*...now, baring in mind this was an actual GCSE graded exam, I was really happy. So, please don't assume that I'm bitching because I didn't get full marks; there were some speakers who were ten times better than me, and for whatever reason, scored three, four, five marks lower, so I'm definitely happy. So yeah; as my English teacher came round to confer with us, her class, I smiled up at her (and I've just realised that she assume I was ticked off...hell's bells, even my happy face is one of absolute displeasure at life...) as she aproached me. ''Ahh, yes,'' she began, rather awkwardly, ''Now, you see Beth, you would've scored full marks in your exam, had you not had those annoying mannerisms of yours...particularly, the ones in your face...''. Well, I was astounded. My immediate response? ''Sorry if I'm too ugly!!''. I told my parents later that evening, and I think they were more irritated then they were amused, which wasn't my intention; I really don't care what some jumped-up, over-qualified teacher thinks of me, or my face. So, I press on, every day. With my ugly face, and my stupid, befuddled brain.

And so far, it's working!!!
I love you all.

28 January, 2012


Well, to be imaginative, I exorcised last night. No, that's not the physical, gym-going 'exercise' with really bad spelling. Exorcism refers to cleansing oneself or an area of spirits with malevolent intent or some such. So, following your absolutely horrible actions this week, I exorcised YOU. That meant finally, FINALLY deleting every text I'd saved about you (the first one dating back to 23rd December 2009), every photo I'd ever taken, every note I'd ever written. That meant ripping up all the cards you've ever given me, putting all your hoodies in the wash to donate to a charity shop, deleting our emails and our Facebook messages, deleting everything about you. It was hard; I was luckily my best friend was there to make the first move, because I'd happily bet that I couldn't have done it without her.

On the plus side though, I can really see now who my real friends are. The people who stuck around, didn't go behind my back and behave like some cheap, underhand wench. The ones I can trust, not to shout stuff about me on the coach to the Dry-Ski slope place. I would name and shame all of you, as I really have that much contempt for you all. But, really? That's one of my first blogging rules, to avoid naming names as much as possible. You guys aren't worth breaking a time-honoured rule like that for.

I hope karma hurts like a bitch.

19 January, 2012


This week. It hasn't been the shining example of why I bother to get out of bed in the mornings, to tell you the truth. It really hasn't given me any erason to stay in Newbury, or in fact, on Planet Earth either.
I mean.
There was the stress. The exam stress, the sudden shedload of coursework-stress etc.
There were the 'friends'. The hatred from a jealous girl, who ended up becoming, rather ironically, the very thing she was hating on me for allegedly being; a 'friend-stealer'. So, I've lost my 'best friends'. But, I suppose that by putting it on my blog, I'm making it clear that, whilst of course I care, and it's hurting, it's their choice. And I have chosen to do nothing about it. I've tried, of course I have. But a girl can only do so much.
And then, there's my dog. My beautiful, funny, amazing, clever, stupid dog. Gnash. Ah, he's the only dog I've ever had, but mark my words, there'll never be another like him. He was a beautiful dog, with so much character and eagerness and willing. No-one knew him like his family, so it seemed right that we were all there to say our last goodbyes. For a Black Labrador, 14 is tremendously good innings; also, he was rather ill. I don't want to say it, but I think it was the kindest thing to do. We know he's not in any pain anymore, which is why we were slowly loosing him as it was. So, wherever you are now Gnash, we all love you. You were the most popular dog I've ever known.

And now, at the end of a long, hot, boring, troublesome and achingly tiring two weeks, I'm crashing into bed. G'night!

14 January, 2012


I now have a Facebook page. Yes, I have a Facebook account, and no, you're not adding me. None of you. So, there. *sticks tongue out*. But, LIKE MY FACEBOOK PAGE!!

Search for,
''The Wisdom Of Beth''
It should come up, in the Search Results, with 'Fictional Character' underneath, and the profile picture will be a sunset. Oh, you know what? You guys find it yourselves; if you come across the page, you'll totally know it's me.

I love you all!


Just a quick update post to supplement you guys, the beautiful WR fans who boosted me to FIVE FLIPPING THOUSAND PAGEVIEWS. THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOOOOOOOOU.
Some days, I really cannot be bothered to sit here and type random posts, telling you guys what dreams I had, showing off how I can rewrite the Bible, etc. etc. But, days like this, when I'm home from work but have yet to take off my shoes, a stack of homework and a messy room, just lift me right up. They really do.
Thank you so, so much for sticking with me thus far. Of course it would be awesome to get more views, but you can't reverse these 5,000 (mwahahahah!) so, that means the world and then some. Thank you guys so much.

04 January, 2012

Dream Diary (take #1)

Although I probably (and statistically) spend about a sixth of my life dreaming, it seems I can seldom remember any of them; which subsequently must mean that they're really beyond the realm of unimportance. This in mind, however, I had a dream last night, which was essentially four parts; half of which were including characters that were familiar to me. Now I know there's probably nothing more boring than sitting through someone elses' dreams, so feel free to leave now; I've got a great website that you can happily waste half your life on, watching endless videos of cats doing various hilarious tricks. Woah. That rhymed. GUYS, I MADE A RHYME. GUUUUUUUUYSSSSSSSSSSSS. GUYS!!!
(In case any of you thought I was joking by the way, the website is http://www.dailyviral.com, enjoy >.<)

So yess'm. The first part of my dream (I think; all I know for sure that are in order are the third and fourth parts) was that of my friend from a couple of years below me (but, not mentally, or physically...well, apart from his age? I don't know...) and I were stood outside my new-ish school buildings, on the strip of tarmac that runs between the outside of the library and the big, approx-diamond outside the front of school, housing a big tree with fairy lights (FAIRY LIGHTS?!, I hear you cry) and he was insisting that his teacher hated him; he was listing various reasons, and I was answering them with more appropriate reasons. For every reason that I managed to match with my own, we'd toast this little paper shot cups and down a mouthful of vodka. He also told me I was funnier when I was trashed.

On to the second part; recently, I downloaded some music onto my iPod, one of these being 'Meet Me On The Equinox' by DCFC. However, flicking through said iPod on Shuffle the other day (everyday, I'm shufflin'), I chanced upon it, and was distraught to realise that I'd purchased that single from the album 'Soundtrack to Twilight'!! And as I love absorbing the cover art every time a new song plays, that's now been ruined for me, so. However, back to the point; evidently, this disasterous turn of events wasn't enough, as the image clearly sank into my subconcious, and stayed there. Firmly. As, when I slept, I had another random dream-moment when I was stood on a darkened landing with a taller, stronger guy, who kissed me once, and left me breathless. (I didn't know who he was), but he was a 'flipping' vampire, clearly...which just shows that my imagination knows no bounds (sarcasm).

Thirdly! This is a wierd one, that ties to the fourth, so bear with me here guys. I was sat, on a bench, with my family and a strange, young boy. He was about six or seven, so vastly capable of speech. But suddenly, a flurry of wasps descended upon our happy gathering, and so what did we do? Well, obviously, we shot casually out to space...and as this poor child was looking awestruck, we sent the wasps away, probably to go and implode or something, and then we all looked back over to planet Earth (a considerable distance, if I do say so myself...) and saw that it was half-shrouded in the thickest black shadow imaginable. My Dad intervened at this point, to let the little boy know that it was 6:30pm in Italy, and that to meet his curfew, the boy needed to be home soonish. So, we promptly flew back to Earth, and set down on an airstrip outside, funnily enough, an airport. A plane then spoke to this flummoxed little child, and told him that he should get the 2:30am plane at the latest, to avoid his Mother being worried. And after that, we left him to it!

This leads me to my fourth part; probably the most distressing, and the one with the clearest reasoning. Basically, I was suddenly walking up what looked like the inside of a passenger plane, but apparently (judging by the scenery flashing past the windows and passenger's apparent ability to get off at various stops) was my bus home. I think it resembled a train at one point, as well...no matter. Onwards! And, some various friends happened to be dotted around the area, in various seats. I was looking for a set of three, because I think my two other best friends were supposed to be with me. And at that point, I spotted my third best friend, sitting rather conveniently in a set of four seats. I bustled up, threw down my bag, and asked her if I could take them, for the four of us to be seated. She agreed, but with the parting shot that, 'Only if you want to totally p*** off __________ (unspecified name)'. At that point, I collapsed into a nearby seat, because I've had recent bad relations with 'Unspecified name' (U.N) and started cursing quietly. He then demonstrates creepy-timing really well, and appears, to start striding up the aisle, accompanied by my metaphorical 'older brother', one of my closest possible male friends, and throws a glare at me, before throwing himself in to the seat in front of me without a word. By now, I have a rapt audience, a mixture of friends and strangers alike, all appearing to be holding their breath, waiting for the next move. I tentatively ask U.N if I can talk to him, and that was the obvious straw that broke the camel's back. I think that, had I left him, he would've glowered some more, before stepping off the bus. But, as I can remember, he turned around, and shot me a look of pure hatred, before launching into a tirade of how selfish I was, and how I didn't deserve any successful relationships in the future. I tried to intervene at one point, with the fruitless, but classic, 'I wrote you a letter on the plane!' which was immediately shot down. It culminated in his saying he never wished to speak to me again, followed by his departure, and my subsequent descent into hysteria.

So there you have it. If you ever wondered where half the material on this blog came from, this is probably your answer.
I must say, I'm rather impressed, if I do say so myself, with my attempts at writing the dreams I had. It was difficult to harness them and hold them for as long as it took to write them down, and I hope that I did a good enough job so that if I suffer from blog nostalgia in future, I can be reminded of this dream. It was a good one, really, especially the last part.

Thank you!

02 January, 2012

I'm going to say it...

I need a massive freaking hug right now. And, this is the really gay part, I need a boy-hug. You know, one of those hugs where you can smell their aftershave and feel their big arms and all the breath gets pushed out of you as he sweeps you up. I think that's partly why I have so many guy-friends, as well as my brother and my Daddy; because, some things in this world, you really cannot do unless it's with a dude. All of my guys friends give good hugs, I've cried on all of them probably more times than I can remember, and I'd probably choose them over most of my girlfriends any day. There's too much drama with a girl. Why are you crying? Who made you cry? What happened? Is it private? So, tell me anyway? Who else knows? Can I ask them? Nah, with boys it's different. With boys? It's like, oh hey. This chick's crying. Let's just hug. It. Owwwwwwt.

Now, I'm not saying I need my girls any less. Just that, for this particular thing, boys are so much better, every time. But hey.

But, I guess it's Sod's Law that the one boy I want a hug from at the moment is also the same boy who made me want a hug. He's also 1,500 miles away right now.
So, that's not good.

I really should choose my moments better, shouldn't I?

I never, ever knew the words 'Baby, Imma set you free' were, like, fatal or something. Hell's Bells, this is really too complicated.

Yet again, I'm contradicting myself; I s'pose boys are complicated. When they freaking want to be.
This is not fair; I want my Leonidas.

And, I'm mad at him because I've never written a blog post about someone like this. I save this stuff for Tumblr and stuff, y'know? Because, I try and blog about everything, that effects everyone. I want to keep you all interested. And it's not fair, because he's made me care about him. And, he doesn't understand!


01 January, 2012

Bring on 2012, I'm ready for this jelly.

Merry New Year!!! I hope you all had a good one?! And by good one, I, of course, mean with copious amounts of alcohol, good food and fiiiiiine tiiiiimes.

I, thanks for asking, had a brilliant night; I'm happy I did something different this year and was able to spend New Year's with some of my best friends, and then go home and get a little bit squiffy. >.< Although, this is the third year in a row that I've not spent with my family, so I think that'll have to change nex- ooh, THIS year.

God, January the 1st. That seems like such a long ole' treck, doesn't it? We were right at the top in December. And then, straight down to the start again. Oh, I'm not being pessimisstic; 2012 is a perfect opportunity for me to relive all my mistakes. ;)

So yeah. Things changed a lot over the course of good ole' 2011. And, much as it pains me to say this, some things happened last year that weren't for the better; but if I had to choose, I wouldn't change it. Apart from, maybe not to have had so many fiiiiiine tiiiiimes and memorable jokings last night as I'm feeling it this morning!

All in all? 2011 can bite me; ''there's a new kid on the block''.

New Year's Resolutions?
Stay away from teenage boys for as long as possible.
Eat healthily.
Do my DofE.

I'm pretty set up for this year.

Millions of thanks and huuuuuuge New Year's Day kisses to everyone who has helped to shape my blog over the last year, and also another million thanks to everyone who read my blog on Christmas day; HAPPINESS!!

I hope your 2012's are as sweet as I'm going to make mine!